The Child of Asur: Part I

Have a story, then you come here.

Moderators: The Heralds, The Loremasters

Post Reply
Message
Author
tomwhar
Posts: 113
Joined: Tue Sep 01, 2009 3:22 pm
Location: Dover, England

The Child of Asur: Part I

#1 Post by tomwhar »

The black ship glided into the port. Eltharion, wearing his soiled armour arose to his feet and grasped at a shoulder infront of him. Over his eyes he wore a white cloth. Beneath his eyes were useless and blinded. Sounds echoed around him. The Witch King had done this to him. After their fierce duel, Eltharion had ben captured, tortured and blinded. With a snarl on his face Eltharion realised he had become an example of the traitorous leader. In his heart burned a fury so intense he thought he would make an inferno of the ship and sink it. He would show them; even if it killed him. Eltharion will always have the last laugh on the traitorous.

He carefully placed his feet along the path the soldier in front of him made. The darkened elf in his grasp was being watched by blind eyes as he led the prisoner across the deck to the boarding plank. He walked down the wooden board and made sure Eltharion made it to the shore. It would be a pity to lose him without Finubar seeing his maimed general. As soon as the shamed commander stepped off the galley slipped into the fog to report back to the Witch King.

A few days later, Eltharion the Blind arrived at Finubar's court. His armour replaced and shining, his reputation dented and dwindling. Finubar greeted Eltharion.
"Eltharion, you are a trustworthy and famous soldier. I have requested you to recover and train under Belannaer in the Tower of Hoeth. I hope that you will benefit greatly by the ways of the Swordmasters."
[color=#4040FF]Please feel free to view my other topics.[/color]
User avatar
Arellion Sapher
Posts: 106
Joined: Mon Dec 08, 2008 6:40 pm
Location: Albion

Re: The Child of Asur: Part I

#2 Post by Arellion Sapher »

Most interesting. It's pretty well written, the minimalist style makes it quite easy to digest. One hopes it won't be a rehash of what has come before, but promising technique nonetheless.
tomwhar
Posts: 113
Joined: Tue Sep 01, 2009 3:22 pm
Location: Dover, England

Re: The Child of Asur: Part I

#3 Post by tomwhar »

Thankyou for your comment. I was worrying you would say it was as bad as The Revengeful Talons which I have erased from my memory! Soon I will write a part 2!
[color=#4040FF]Please feel free to view my other topics.[/color]
Post Reply